I shouldn’t be disappointed after trying for one month.

But I am. One month of trying (and we both had a cold so we didn’t even try that hard) and we’re not pregnant – and I feel like a bit of a failure. Even though I know that’s incredibly stupid and that three to six months of trying is normal.

My husband and I are young (he’s 31, I’m 28) fit, and we eat ridiculously healthily. We’re also obsessive planners and we’ve been planning every little aspect of our pregnancy and having a baby for years. But the problem is, we’re a bit ahead of the baby game – none of our good friends are having babies yet. Lots of them are getting married or settling in to serious relationships, but babies aren’t on many of their horizons.

I don’t think my husband is too bothered about this, but I wish I had someone to share it with – someone to tell me, from an external point of view, that I’m being a moron and that it’ll happen soon, at the right time. I met a girl I went to school with a few months ago at a mutual friend’s hen party, and she is also baby planning – it was such a pleasure to talk to her, and it made me really sad not to have that in my every day life. I’ve got my Mum, and my husband is absolutely wonderful and very understanding and sensitive – but it would be nice to really live through it with someone.

Hence this blog. I’m hoping that some other people like me might stumble upon it and tell me what they’re doing, how they’re feeling and where they’re up to. Maybe we can simultaneously reassure each other and share some (vague) knowledge!

In the mean time, I’m going to try to blog every day (or most days, at least) and share the things I’ve discovered so far. Hopefully at some point I will be able to tell you some good news, and then we can launch into the whole new weird adventure of being pregnant – and still having no one to talk to about it! I can’t even imagine what that’s going to be like. I’ve never had a baby before and I’m not any kind of expert. I work in a University (not as an academic!) and all I’ve done is read the first chapter of a few books about having babies.

Just like everyone else, I suppose – stepping into the unknown with a mixture of total excitement and total terror.


2 thoughts on “I shouldn’t be disappointed after trying for one month.

  1. Reading through your thoughts, each line, and at every point, I could not but help to laugh. This is actually my second month of waiting for my ” Little one” to begin its journey in me. And just like you, I could remember crying like a baby and pulling some tantrums on everything when I my AF showed on my first month of trying.

    I had pictures of my friends who conceived the very first month. Few though. But the average conception rate from my calculations for the people I know have been between 3 to 6 months. Just like you, I felt like I failed. But at some point, I stumbled on a biblical verse in the psalms, that talked said except God builds a house, they labour in vain that build it, and that no matter our nightly and daily toil and activities ( much in the baby business gymnast I guess) children are a reward from God.

    I saw my AF again this second month. But I feel so much happy, I and my husband. We have done our bits, and we guess we have to hold on and trust the one who has power over the invisible bit, the one that goes on much inside of us.

    Hopefully, I’d blog a positive response, this third month. And if not, I guess it’s not time just Yet! But I surely know it would be, before I loose my mind!!!

    • Thanks so much for your reply. I hoped that people would share similar experiences when I started this blog – it definitely helps me feel less alone! My doctor said 3-6 months too so hopefully the next few months will bring good news for us both. 🙂

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